Blog by Jedde

I often make my mother cry.  When she attempts to inquire, investigate, and challenge, I respond with an equally fiery and booming voice. Later, when her tears gush, she would tell me I would regret it and that I too, would soon feel her pain when I become a mother myself.  This looming warning has prevented me from enjoying the idea of motherhood. I thought to myself, perhaps, I could not become a good mother because of this. I will never amount to anything other than a woman who has made her own mom cry. I would look inward and start blaming my intenseness. I would often question myself - am I too much? But I learned that you can never be too much for anyone who loves you dearly. And this will be a hard-earned wisdom I will pass on to my son -- that you can be difficult, and still be loved. That you can speak your truth, and still be loved. That you can pave your own path, and still be loved.  Because even though I make my mom cry a lot, we fight a lot, and she gives scary warnings l