Blog by Jedde

  It's quite ironic how we crave other people's validation and yet we couldn't even give some for ourselves.  Imagine working so hard to make ends meet, being employed in a job that you only tolerate just so you can provide for your family, setting aside your own needs so that you can deliver what's expected of you - but then, at the end of a long, tiring day, what you've been dying to hear is a word of appreciation from your family and friends. It's that simple, yes? You don't require much to keep going. All you need is to hear that what you're sacrificing, what you're working hard for, is being appreciated by the people you're gifting it to.  But here lies the gap. A missing piece.  You seek the validation of others, forgetting that you must offer it to yourself first. You long to be seen, to be embraced, to be told that we're doing so well, and yet you scarcely even notice your own hard work. You hardly embrace yourself after a difficult d...

"When it rains and it pours, the thunder and the lights shatter in the sky, and your heart wonders  in solitude, if you're  truly ever worth loving. They told you that you  get the love you deserve, but as soon as the lightning strikes, you are illuminated with the truth - that you are too broken to be put together and nobody keeps a broken glass, not even the king's men who  put Humpty Dumpty  together again. In a stormy night when the clouds are burdened  with tears gushing through  their  tender skins; you gather your broken pieces and lay there in silence. The door opens and  the one  who brings the lamp appears. With his sleeping soul, he sees you in the ebony of darkness and takes a step - and each step of his  is coated with  deafening  silence. The lamp bringer  casts  a  light on your broken pieces; A timid flicker at first,  and  then a loud burst altogether - of  a million stars shi...

Accepting criticism is a hard pill to swallow. Especially when it is given without compassion. When we give our best efforts on something that we're passionate about, only to be told that it isn't good enough, we usually accept it and think it is sensible. Especially when it is coming from someone who we know has the best intentions for us. But what if it came from someone who doesn't care about us? What if that criticism was given without compassion? How would that feel? Usually, it feels really awful, don't you think so? Like someone stabbed us right in the heart. After all, we spent hours working hard on it. We went through a lot of troubles. We had to hear all the loud voices in our head magnifying our insecurities and press on really hard to overcome them. They don't know anything about how greatly we worked hard for it and yet they still throw these insensitive remarks at us.  It is unavoidable to experience this in our lives. People will always have something...

Three days changed my life. It was during those three days at the Kool Adventure Camp that ignited my passion for facilitating. The year was 2011. I was a first-year University student then, filled with insecurities, doubts, and uncertainties. I never knew what was in store for me but the moment I experienced the program for myself, I began discovering that I had a magnificent amount of courage tucked within the corners of my inner world, waiting to be unleashed. We climbed high-walls and shakey pamper poles, jumped at scary heights, and discovered ourselves, along with my colleagues from the Sangguniang Kabataan. In those challenging moments of conquering dragons, there was one aspect of the experience that inspired me so much so that I wanted to emulate them. That aspect, one of the most important elements of effecting this massive and beautiful change in me, is no other than the instructors and facilitators.  September 2011. We were interconnected. The middle person was blindfo...

There are those whose ferocity I admire. They speak their minds without hesitation. Engage in difficult conversations with ease. Talk with confidence about their causes. I've constantly wondered about the source of such fire within them - where it came from, how it grew.  Then, I look at myself - hesitant in admitting a vulnerable fact about my own beliefs. But now here I am making a choice. To open up. To show myself. To talk about it. For what purpose? Perhaps, relief. Perhaps, understanding. Perhaps, to set myself free from the pain of bearing an immense pressure coming from everywhere around me in all directions.  Am I the only one who feels this way? I admit that the admiration I have for the ferocious ones actually hides a creeping insecurity inside me, covered with a cloak of invisibility. It is present. But it's not visible. I deeply castigate myself as though I am a prisoner inside a dungeon filled with thick cobwebs and suffocating smoke.  Why couldn't I b...

Beautiful image from Oriol Angrill Jordà | IG: @oriolangrill | Website: oriolangrill.com You're struggling to make sense of the world around you now. Everything seems topsy-turvy. The fire that once blazed inside your soul is fading; the drive that you had deep within you is decelerating. You wanted this year to be the time to upgrade yourself. To change for the better. So, you filled your life with a list - containing the plans you have for yourself - ready to be ticked off, ready to be conquered. Better career, learn new skills, date that special someone, travel to a place you've always dreamed of, start a new outlook in life. Zest and hope flowed in your veins. Inspiration was abundant anywhere you look.  Then, all of a sudden, a black out happens. Everything goes dark. A few moments passed and there's light again. Only this time, you look around and realize the world has changed. Now, life is different. Your sadness is unmistakably filling up to the brim. I feel your s...

Celebrating my 5th birthday with my sister and cousins. Happy with Filipino-style spaghetti and orange juice! As little girls, my parents would often remind me and my sister to be grateful for what we have. We grew up in a simple household. Usually, our breakfast, lunch, and dinner doesn't change in variety. The food is cooked in the morning and is reheated for the next meals. Yes, there were many instances when we would complain about why it's always repeating. As young children, we wanted to try eating new dishes too. We would whine about it and sometimes throw tantrums, to which my parents would reply: "Be grateful for the food on the table." We didn't understand what that truly meant back then. We thought it was just our parents nagging us and reminding us the same message over and over again like a broken record. We would even lip sync! When we eat and rice grains fall off from the plate, even if it's just a few grains, our parents would scol...