Your Struggles Don't Make You A Failure

Beautiful image from Oriol Angrill Jordà | IG: @oriolangrill | Website: oriolangrill.com

You're struggling to make sense of the world around you now. Everything seems topsy-turvy. The fire that once blazed inside your soul is fading; the drive that you had deep within you is decelerating. You wanted this year to be the time to upgrade yourself. To change for the better. So, you filled your life with a list - containing the plans you have for yourself - ready to be ticked off, ready to be conquered. Better career, learn new skills, date that special someone, travel to a place you've always dreamed of, start a new outlook in life. Zest and hope flowed in your veins. Inspiration was abundant anywhere you look. 

Then, all of a sudden, a black out happens. Everything goes dark. A few moments passed and there's light again. Only this time, you look around and realize the world has changed. Now, life is different.

Your sadness is unmistakably filling up to the brim. I feel your sorrow. I know you've made plans and it hurts you to put them inside a box only to be tucked away in one corner to collect dust. It's amazing how you constantly bring yourself to smile each day despite the uncertainty that fogs your vision. Your great capacity to learn how to live a life inside a compartment, seeing no sky above you, is remarkable. But in reality, I know it is breaking you a little everyday. How indeed, can you live your life fully, the way you wanted to - when you are confined within the four walls of your home? Even your own home feels empty despite the fact that everyone you love is with you. 

You are trying to adjust to this and it's difficult.

I know you want this to be over. I understand how badly you want to savour the sunshine on your face, feel the cooling breeze of the ocean, see the soft clouds from an aircraft you're on board in, and hug your family and friends ever so tightly. So, there are many times, you pretend that this is all a bad dream. You eagerly want to wake up from it already. 

If only that were the case, but sadly it is not. 

Hold your horses. Do not let go of that flicker of hope within you just yet. Not today. Perhaps, not ever. You may be struggling now. But do remember that your struggles never mean you're a failure. They just remind you that you're alive and you're blessed with another chance to set your eyes upon the blessings in your lives that you haven't noticed before. 

You don't drown by falling into the water - you drown by staying under. So lift your head up and stand back up again. 

Understand that while some of your plans may be sealed inside that box, there are many things in your midst that have the power to enkindle your sense of wonder, excitement, and zest once again. You only need to see them with new lenses. 

Define old words with new meanings. 

First, your worth is no longer based on the public's approval. Start accepting - truly, wholeheartedly, unapologetically - the fact that you are worthy, regardless of what other people say, or how much you've accomplished in your life. So do not beat yourself up in trying to become the perfect parent, the perfect partner, the perfect worker just because the world tells you to do so. 

Because now, the world is different and many concepts do not apply to the current wave of time anymore.

Second, success never equals accolades. So, do not look down on yourself just because you have not gained the amount of likes you want, earned that degree, promotion at work, or earned millions on your business. Define your own kind of success. That kind of definition you feel good about. It is something internal and cannot be stolen away from you. It can be going to bed earlier than usual, eating breakfast, being happy. 

Think about it for a moment.

Third, productivity does not necessarily equate to a better quality of life. So, if you feel sluggish or antsy today, it's okay. If you feel like you do not know what to do, that's fine. Better be someone kind and courageous than forcing yourself to be productive. It is your kindness and courage in this tough, changing world that can lead you to the direction of your dreams. Yes, even despite this tragedy. 

Our mind gets dark sometimes. Let's try to find each other in the night.

So, even if you're struggling to make sense of the world today, please remember that there is still that fire inside you, burning. Your drive in life has not come to a full stop. Gather yourself together and think how far you've come in life. You've gone through many challenges and you made it here. Take a deep breath. Tell yourself stories of your triumphs. Remember the strength you unleashed to overcome your hurdles in life. That strength was quiet. But it was fierce. 

As fierce as the quiet sound of the moon as it moves the sea or when a seed sprouts from the ground.

You're struggling. But you're not a failure. 

Remember that.

Love,

Mary Jedde