Life in Lockdown: An Introvert's Perspective

I'm beginning to feel even more restless. Now that the circuit breaker and ECQ measures have been extended, I cannot say that I'm perfectly calm about it. Each day, I watch the world move a slow pace from outside my window. Cabs in long queues instead of people, a person who just bought a bag of groceries trying to cross the street, a few vehicles driving by, and the trees calmly swaying their branches under the sun.

The fight against the crisis still continues up to this day. Although now, my extroverted personality craves to be tended. All I could do is dream - going to a café, meeting with my closest friends and chit-chatting with them, or maybe having a date with Alex and taking lots of photos around Singapore.

Alex. I wonder how he's coping with all that's going on right now. You might probably know about this but one very clear thing about us is that he and I have different ways to recharge. As an extrovert, I gain my energy in social situations, often seen as energetic and outgoing, and I find interacting with others a piece of cake; whereas Alex, who is an introvert, is more reflective, reserved, and gets energised when he is at home.

I pondered about whether he has the same problems as I do. Does he also feel dismayed because he couldn't get out from the house as much as he'd like? Does he feel trapped too? I felt curious. I wanted to know about his views surrounding the current situation that's affecting everyone around the world. This curiosity drove me to grab my phone from my desk. I asked if I could interview him to share about his life in lockdown from an introvert's perspective. I'm happy that he agreed.

So ladies and gentlemen, please help me welcome a very special guest on the blog, Alex! :-)

What you are about to read below are his thoughts about being an introvert, how he's dealing with his life in lockdown, and sharing his tips about ways we can cope with this new norm. These are all candid words from him and the questions I've asked are based on my curiosity. If you want to share about your own thoughts with regard to this, or would love to ask him questions, perhaps you can leave your message on the comments section below. Without further ado, let's begin!

Question 1

Jedde: "Are you an introvert?"

Alex: "Yes, in a way. Self-confessed introvert."

I didn't really know how to start this interview so I asked an easy question. He even thought about what his answer was before giving me one. One characteristic of introverts is that they think first, before anything else. They listen patiently and their words matter because of this.

Source: https://seotradenews.com/a-simple-guide-to-marketing-for-introverts/

Question 2

Jedde: "Why do you say you're an introvert?"

Alex: "Aside from the fact that I have poor socializing skills, I don't really crave social gatherings. I like to have my own individual space."

Introverts have a quiet approach to life. They need solitary time and often prefers to stay where there are less people (like at home) rather than be surrounded with a large group of people. Perhaps, many of us would think that they dislike us because they tend to be quiet, but in truth, it is really that introverts prefer closer, more meaningful relationships. We'll get more to this in a bit.

Source: https://virink.com/art/871597

Question 3

Jedde: "Does this sense of not craving for any social gatherings make you feel lonely?"

Alex: "No."

He answered this question without hesitating. It doesn't mean that while he prefers to stay in his own space, he is lonely. He gets his energy from solitude, quietness, and pondering about the thoughts in his head. In fact, being an introvert has many perks including having great imagination and a strong sense of self. They usually do not need crave for external validation.

Source: https://writerswrite.co.za/the-perks-of-being-an-introvert/

Question 4

Jedde: "Is it like the norm for you? Is it something that you had to adjust to? (A follow-up query to question 3)"

Alex: "Yes, it's my norm. Basically, it's also because I'm an only child. But it doesn't mean that I grew up lonely. I have my friends and my family. But, it's just that I tend to like having my own space and be able to listen to my thoughts. I do enjoy constant meetings with friends, but it's not really gatherings of more than 10 or 15 people. Usually, it's in small groups."

In the past, when I would invite him over to one of my friends' gatherings, I would get annoyed at his quietness and aloofness. I didn't understand it then. It was only when we spent more time communicating that I found out his preference for small group gatherings. When introverts are surrounded with large numbers of people, their energy usually gets drained.

Source: Introvert Struggles

Question 5

Jedde: "So we are experiencing a pandemic now. People are being asked to stay at home, work from home. A lot of netizens are either feeling suffocated about not being able to go out, or they are trying their very best to be productive while indoor and feel stressed about it, so generally, as an introvert or as Alex, how do you feel about being asked to stay home? 

Alex: "I think with regard to being asked to stay home, right now, there are a lot of modern entertainments that can keep us engaged.  For me, I find it in playing video games. I've been doing that since I was young. Yes, I seldom play by myself. I occasionally enjoy playing it with other players too so that it's fun. I'm thankful because that option (video games) exists. Even though I'm asked to stay at home, I have no problem about it because I know I can keep myself entertained.

But if we put it in a case that we don't have the internet, that we don't have other means to keep ourselves entertained electronically, I think I can say that I will certainly feel the boredom. But, it doesn't mean that  I cannot find other ways to keep myself entertained. If I'm not playing video games, I also have other activities that I like to do. For example, I like to tinker on stuff."

Because introverts are more used to staying at home than extroverts, a life in lockdown to them might seem like a norm. Perhaps, we can take some insights from their experience to help us understand that there truly are many ways to cope with this quarantine period. 

Also, research supports that there are two important chemicals in our brains: dopamine and acetylcholine. Dopamine makes extroverts feel energized. However, this chemical makes introverts over-stimulated. What introverts need more is acetylcholine. This is produced when activities like drawing, concentrating, or focusing are being done. Acetylcholine produced in the brain helps introverts feel relaxed and contented. You can watch this video to learn more.

Source: Introvert Struggles on Instagram

Question 6

Jedde: "Do you find it fun to tinker?"

Alex: "Yes, and engaging in a way. It's something I personally enjoy, not necessarily things that other people can do with me. I also like to try different cooking methods or cook different meals or food. Although they cannot keep me entertained for hours, and is also costly, it's something that I have fun doing. Another thing is planting. Basically, it's like what National Geographic's motto says, "always curious". Anything that might pique my interest I'll try to learn. So, that way, I can be engaged in something."

Alex enjoys cooking more than I do. He makes sure to try and explore new ways of doing things. He also asks me questions about many things. We often talk for a long period of time because his questions engage me and I find our conversations deep and meaningful. 

Source: Buddha Doodles

Question 7

Jedde: "What is it about these activities that make them enjoyable? What makes it fun for you?"

Alex: "I noticed it about myself, I usually do things that can be done by one person alone. Although it can be difficult and tiring, but still it can be done. About that part, I'll have fun since I'm always curious. Questions pop up in my head one after the other. It's an endless train of hows and whys. That's why it seems to be non-stop. So I get myself into it."

Introverts are filled with so many thoughts inside their heads. Engaging in deep thinking and introspection helps them to be occupied. They are rarely distracted and keeps a focus on things that they are currently engaged with. In our lives right now, perhaps we were used to having so many distractions that we have forgotten to stay attuned to the thoughts inside our heads. 

Question 8

Jedde: "Are you experiencing struggles with being asked to stay home and having limited options to stay out do whatever you want outside, maybe go to the park, or go to the malls, or travel somewhere? What are some of the struggles that you're experiencing?"

Alex: "Right now because of the pandemic, the only few inconveniences I feel is that I don't like to wear masks. I also don't like the thought of limited essentials, now that many shops are strictly closed especially when we need to buy something. But that's the only few inconveniences."

We are experiencing this pandemic in different degrees. What is important is to have that mindfulness on how we express our emotions and feelings about it. When we express how we feel, this does not equate to being privileged. Rather, it is more about being aware of what's your present state, saying it out loud, and then reframing ourselves to see a more hopeful view on things to keep us going. Our emotions and feelings are valid whoever we are.

Source: @ihebaelshich snipped from Twitter

Question 9

Jedde: "How about internal struggles with just staying home?"

Alex: "None in particular, because like I said, I can keep myself entertained."

This experience is an invitation for the rest of us who are not introverts to slowly shift our attention into things that can help produce acetylcholine in our brains. We can try to adapt an introvert's lifestyle and discover for ourselves that it is in fact as good as when we are outside. It's definitely worth the try!

Source: Aaron T. Caycedo-Kimura / INFJoe.wordpress.com

Question 10

Jedde: "Do you find it necessary to cope with the situation now?"

Alex: "Yes, but not as much as those who constantly want to go outside and meet people. I still have to cope on some things because of the lockdown. There are precautions needed to be done when going out. But given a scenario where there is food, water, shelter, and we don't need to buy more items, in situations like that, I wouldn't be leaving the house at all! Even on a normal day."

He isn't kidding at all. I prefer to go out and discover new places and take photos. He, on the other hand, prefers to stay indoors where he can listen to his thoughts and reconnect with himself, and it's also his safe zone. 

Source: Bored Panda

Question 11

Jedde: "How would you describe your emotion right now?"

Alex: "I'm sad because even though I'm used to being at home, it's still not the normal life, because there are changes that need to be done. So I also don't like it. Even though the thought is I'm just at home. It's different when you're at home because you want to be, rather than because you are told to stay inside the house. I think the freedom is the difference there. Yes I like to be at home, but I still like to have the option to go out."

Source: Introvert Doodle  as snipped from The Conversation

Question 12

Jedde: "Last question, what 1-2 tips can you give to the people who will read this blog? In the perspective of an introvert, what advice can you share with us?"

Alex: "I think as humans, regardless whether an introvert or extrovert, we really need to do something no matter how simple it is, like we should be talking with someone, or doing something else. It just so happens that introverts deal with activities with fewer people. 

It all boils down to really occupying our minds. There are so many things that we can do, regardless of whether we are fortunate to have internet connection, or having a huge backyard, or having a decent kitchen, there are many things that you can do to keep yourself and your mind active. It doesn't have to be about self-improvement. 

In fact, it can also be something that you can do for others. Maybe help your grandparents or parents or siblings. Basically, we should not limit ourselves with what's the trend because there are still a lot of things that can be done just lying in front of us, waiting for it to be noticed."

His depth inspires me. I have gained some new insights on how I can cope better with our situation now. As an extrovert, yes it is a difficult time because I cannot recharge myself by going out to meet my friends, or travel to new places, but at the same time, I am also excited to appreciate the beauty of solitude, quietness, and reflection. 

Somehow, I feel that introverts have always been the solid foundation of this noisy world. They are able to think deeply and are not easily swayed by the world's rapid motion. Instead, they are grounded and tries their best to explore new things. Without introverts, the world would become a chaotic mess. 

There is no telling when this pandemic will end. It is also expected that we are unable to retrieve the norm that we were used to. There will soon be a new normal that's about to come in our midst. Hopefully, what that time comes, we're now better equipped with our new-found sense of appreciation of stillness and quietness as introverts do. Collectively, this will become one of our strength narratives and will propel us forward into a more loving, kind, and supportive world.

Thank you Schatz, for agreeing to participate in this interview. 

To the rest of us, may we also give more appreciation to our friends and loved ones who are introverts. Let's give them a shoutout in our thoughts. I'm pretty sure they prefer that more than giving them our loud, energetic attention. 

What are your thoughts? What was your favorite part about today's story? Share your comments below. Bye for now! You're welcome to come and visit the blog again in the next post.

Love, 

Mary Jedde